An early morning walk in the light mist and rain this morning was not such a bad idea after all! Why don’t I do this more often? Third trimester sleep can be a real struggle for me, but through it, I am learning. One of the biggest and hardest lessons I am learning is that of taking charge of my thoughts and commanding my mind in those uncomfortable waking moments of the night. This has made the biggest impact on how my mornings will begin.
I have had a lot of good nights…and a lot of challenging nights lately it seems. Sometimes I forget even the basic things that might help in the middle of the night as I am just plain irritated about another moment of restless sleep and trying to get comfortable, thinking about how many hours I have left to try to recharge before morning. Last night landed in the restless zone. My husband, Brandon suggested that I play some music to see if that would help. It helped immensely! I still didn’t sleep amazingly, but when I’d wake up there was a song going through my mind to focus on instead of all the negative thoughts. The door was now closed to the barrage of anxiety and fearful thoughts that often try to sneak their way in during the night hours. (Some of them can seem so ridiculously silly once morning light comes, but boy can they seem real in the middle of the night.)
This morning as I walked in the rain, I kept thinking about what a kind Daddy God I have and His thoughts over me. So kind in fact that He COMMANDS His loving kindness towards me. (Psalms 42:8) In the last part of that same verse it says that His songs will be with me in the night.
My receiving of both of these things depends on how well I guard my mind and take charge of what thoughts, etc. I allow in. His thoughts towards me comfort me today…and the fact that He doesn’t put condemnation on me in this learning curve. Instead, He comes in the night watch and in my anxious moments He treats me like He did the disciples. He takes charge, asks me why I’m afraid, and shows me the way through. He is a good, good Father!
Songs for your Nights
“The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, And in the night His song shall be with me—A prayer to the God of my life.” (Psalm 42:8)
by Vera Smoker
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Identity Statements with Background Music
Over 40 minutes of Scriptural Beliefs and Identity Statements read allowed with soothing background music. Perfect for use when baby is sleeping, playing, during travel, etc.
The turkey has been demolished. The yummy delicious dishes that took time to make are now mostly devoured and declared to be good. Naps and sleep that were forgone in order to make the dishes in between juggling baby and real life are forgotten in the warmth of memories made around the food. Hearts are full and grateful here. It was a Thanksgiving to remember.
This morning was a mix of play and work, cloudy faces and happy faces. In the middle of folding Sunday and Monday’s laundry with the little tots I wondered, ‘what did Eve struggle with as a Mom?’ The first mom ever. No other moms before her or around her to compare herself with. No endless approaches to sort through. No moms saying you ‘should’ this or that. She was the first. Was she a crunchy perfect organic mom? Or was she okay with peanut butter and jelly sandwich days for her boys? Did she struggle to respond instead of react? Did she get tired of telling her kids for the 99th time to ‘chew with your mouth closed’? Or did she just let that one slide? Did she struggle to make the choice to stay present some days? Did she ever snap and tell Adam, ‘I need a break?’
I never wanted kids. I wanted a career, I wanted to climb the corporate ladder. I wanted to keep going back to school for higher degrees. We were married six months when we found out we were expecting our first child. At the time I was working in a doctor’s office and I asked my co-worker to administer a pregnancy test. She smiled and gave me a big hug and said ‘congratulations, it’s positive.’ I felt like my whole world crumbled. I held back my tears in front of my co-worker, as I did not want her to think I was a terrible person for not being excited about this news. But I definitely was not excited. In fact, I would even say that I was in denial. I was a little numb…