FREEDOM TO BE A GOOD MOTHER
Have you ever felt the pressure to be a “good” Mom? Have you ever struggled with feelings of guilt for mistakes you’ve made, things you should have done, time you should have spent? The opportunities to experience the pain of this kind of guilt, and ultimately shame about you as a mother, are endless. Just like everything else in life, hindsight is 20/20, and there is always that “one more thing” you could have done or could do.
Just take a look at Jesus’ words to His disciples, “…‘How hard it will be for those who are wealthy to enter the kingdom of God!’… ‘Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.’ They were even more astonished and said to Him, ‘Then who can be saved?’ Looking at them, Jesus said, ‘With people it is impossible, but not with God; for all things are possible with God’.” (Matthew 10:23-27 NASB). If you look at the context of this verse, Jesus had just encountered a rich young ruler who wanted to know what it took to inherit eternal life. He had kept all the commandments! However, Jesus, with compassion for him, told him that he must give up everything that he possessed and follow Him. WOW!
To be a wealthy ruler during that time didn’t just mean he had lots of money or valuables; it also meant he had much authority, responsibility, and status. He had probably inherited what he had, and needed to do all that he could to maintain the blessing of his family over all that he possessed. He had done his best by keeping all of God’s commandments, but even with that mindset, Jesus reminded him that there would always be that “one more thing” he would need to do to earn eternity.
Instead, if he truly wanted to inherit the blessing of eternity, he would need to give to God all that he possessed and follow the leading of God’s Spirit. He would need to trust God and rely on Him to receive salvation. While the disciples pointed out the impossibility of the young ruler’s situation, Jesus reminded them of the possibilities offered in salvation if one could give what they have to God so that He could prosper them.
This has offered much hope to me, and I’ve learned to be free of guilt as a Mom. When the thoughts come in that: I should have done different, I could have done more, or I made a mistake; instead of carrying that guilt around that does not benefit anyone or anything, I receive mercy. I realize that my God is the God of mercy and the God of redemption. I can quickly repent for my mistakes, give them to God to make something beautiful out of my mess, and agree with God for the salvation of the situation. Carrying it around in guilt and shame only serves to destroy, but giving it to God, along with the ultimate authority of that area of my life, brings life! I can stop focusing on my mistakes and the areas that I perceive lack, when I give what I actually have to give. Once I do this, I find out that all that was needed from me was actually what I had to give. That’s because we can only give away what we have actually received from God. When I give to Him, and ultimately my situation, all that I possess, I release the outcome to Him that was limited when I was defined by it—good or bad.
Everything we do in the Kingdom is for the purpose of pointing the way to God. He is our focal point. Our beginning and end. Therefore, we can’t carry the guilt or glory for outcomes, as we steward His treasures and lead them to Him. We need help in this stewarding, and God has given us everything we need in order to do this through His Salvation, His Word, and His Spirit. He has given us Himself. So, if we give to God all that we possess, we are led by Him, and we realize that what is needed from us is only what we have to give; we have moved from the impossible to possible!
If you’ve failed in doing this—and we ALL have our moments—receive mercy and take the opportunity today to give what you possess and their outcomes to the Savior. It’s actually a really beautiful thing… In our process of learning how to be a son or daughter to our Father in Heaven, we are teaching our children how to be one as well, and to know Him for who He truly is! We want them to know that they are forgiven, and so are we! Their answers will ultimately not be found in us, but in their connection to their Heavenly Father. Let’s hand them over to Him moment by moment, so that we do not carry what we were never meant to carry.
Say goodbye to guilt and shame today as a Mother. Give them to God—they never helped you or yours, anyway
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Kintsugi has always intrigued me. When a small dish from the treasury of my Grandma’s china that had been passed down to me broke the other week, I almost tossed it right into the trash can. But mid toss I stopped and said out loud, ‘No. Verna! She knows how to do kintsugi! I want to do that with this dish.’ At that point I immediately picked up the phone and put in my request for a little help and know-how for the project which turned into a fun morning and lunch together.
Throughout over 30 years of ministering identity and destiny to children, we have put together many prayers, identity statements, and tools to empower and speak truth into precious young lives. Here we have the privilege of being able to offer some of these resources just for YOU to minister life in your very own home.
Through this simple, but powerful lesson plan, teach your children the authority that they have over the enemy and how they have the power to choose what they will allow to affect their heart and soul.